SI
SI
discoversearch

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor.  We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community.  If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.

   PastimesLaughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke


Previous 10 Next 10 
To: Joachim K who wrote (61022)10/23/2021 1:54:56 PM
From: Stephen O
9 Recommendations   of 61416
 
WHY OUR HEALTH CARE COSTS ARE SO HIGH!!!

Kevin had shingles.
Those of us who spend much time in a doctor's office should appreciate
this! Doesn't it seem more and more that physicians are running their
practices like an assembly line?
Here's what happened to Kevin:

Kevin walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him
what he had. Kevin said: 'Shingles.' So she wrote down his name,
address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat.

Fifteen minutes later a nurse's aide came out and asked Kevin what he had...
Kevin said, 'Shingles.' So she wrote down his height, weight, a
complete medical history and told Kevin to wait in the examining room.

A half hour later a nurse came in and asked Kevin what he had. Kevin
said, 'Shingles..' So the nurse gave Kevin a blood test, a blood
pressure test, an electrocardiogram, and told Kevin to take off all
his clothes and wait for the doctor.

An hour later the doctor came in and found Kevin sitting patiently in
the nude and asked Kevin what he had.
>>>>
Kevin said, 'Shingles.' The doctor asked, 'Where?'
Kevin said, 'Outside on the truck. Where do you want me to unload 'em??'

Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last ReadRead Replies (1)


To: Stephen O who wrote (61023)10/25/2021 5:11:45 PM
From: Stephen O
4 Recommendations   of 61416
 
There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the

Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.

Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for
her first day promptly at 8:00 am.

The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door.

The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new
Employee.

He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line

is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.


The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2
men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is
so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory
floor and they're really beginning to pile up.

At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle
Me Elmo's. She has a roll of plush Red fabric and a huge bag of small
marbles.

The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric,
wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little
package between Elmo's legs.

The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of
hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Lena .

'I'm sorry,' he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, 'but
I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday...'



'Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles'.

Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last ReadRead Replies (1)


To: Stephen O who wrote (61024)10/25/2021 6:47:58 PM
From: Jeffrey S. Mitchell
   of 61416
 
The short version, couched as a pickup line:

Can I see if I can make you laugh by giving you two test tickles?

- Jeff

Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last ReadRead Replies (1)


To: Jeffrey S. Mitchell who wrote (61025)10/25/2021 9:21:39 PM
From: Savant
1 Recommendation   of 61416
 
Or the coed warning the new coed about a certain professor...."don't worry about the quizees, it's the testees."

Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last Read


From: Savant10/25/2021 9:22:15 PM
5 Recommendations   of 61416
 
Ol' Frank..


Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last Read


To: Jams who wrote (61015)10/26/2021 5:14:28 AM
From: ekimaa
2 Recommendations   of 61416
 
Now that's strange. I figured it's twenty firth street as the person who painted the number has a lisp.

Mike

Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last Read


To: TimF who wrote (60991)10/30/2021 8:01:15 AM
From: MeTwo
   of 61416
 
Excellent :D

Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last Read


To: Savant who wrote (60993)10/30/2021 8:02:40 AM
From: MeTwo
   of 61416
 
Haha, very good!

Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last Read


From: Joachim K10/31/2021 4:27:45 AM
1 Recommendation   of 61416
 
BREAKING NEWS:

Feeling the need to do her part, Kamala Harris landed in Tahiti today to help with the rescue effort.

Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last Read


From: Joachim K10/31/2021 4:29:15 AM
3 Recommendations   of 61416
 
A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"

Share RecommendKeepReplyMark as Last ReadRead Replies (1)
Previous 10 Next 10