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   PastimesLaughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke


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To: Pianoman1997 who wrote (61020)10/19/2021 7:54:18 PM
From: Kevin Podsiadlik
   of 61555
 
Along those lines, here's this from Apple:


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From: Joachim K10/21/2021 7:58:17 PM
8 Recommendations   of 61555
 
A Spaniard visiting the United States went into a store to buy a pair of socks. He spoke no English, and the clerk didn’t know a word of Spanish.

Through pantomime, the Spaniard tried to explain what he needed, without much success. The clerk brought out shoes, then tried sneakers, then slippers, then laces — all to no avail.

Finally, he came out of the stockroom with a pair of socks, and the Spaniard exclaimed, “Eso si? que es!”

Said the exasperated clerk, “Well, for crying out loud. If you could spell it, why didn’t you say so in the first place?”

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To: Joachim K who wrote (61022)10/23/2021 1:54:56 PM
From: Stephen O
9 Recommendations   of 61555
 
WHY OUR HEALTH CARE COSTS ARE SO HIGH!!!

Kevin had shingles.
Those of us who spend much time in a doctor's office should appreciate
this! Doesn't it seem more and more that physicians are running their
practices like an assembly line?
Here's what happened to Kevin:

Kevin walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him
what he had. Kevin said: 'Shingles.' So she wrote down his name,
address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat.

Fifteen minutes later a nurse's aide came out and asked Kevin what he had...
Kevin said, 'Shingles.' So she wrote down his height, weight, a
complete medical history and told Kevin to wait in the examining room.

A half hour later a nurse came in and asked Kevin what he had. Kevin
said, 'Shingles..' So the nurse gave Kevin a blood test, a blood
pressure test, an electrocardiogram, and told Kevin to take off all
his clothes and wait for the doctor.

An hour later the doctor came in and found Kevin sitting patiently in
the nude and asked Kevin what he had.
>>>>
Kevin said, 'Shingles.' The doctor asked, 'Where?'
Kevin said, 'Outside on the truck. Where do you want me to unload 'em??'

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To: Stephen O who wrote (61023)10/25/2021 5:11:45 PM
From: Stephen O
4 Recommendations   of 61555
 
There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the

Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.

Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for
her first day promptly at 8:00 am.

The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door.

The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new
Employee.

He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line

is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.


The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2
men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is
so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory
floor and they're really beginning to pile up.

At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle
Me Elmo's. She has a roll of plush Red fabric and a huge bag of small
marbles.

The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric,
wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little
package between Elmo's legs.

The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of
hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Lena .

'I'm sorry,' he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, 'but
I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday...'



'Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles'.

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To: Stephen O who wrote (61024)10/25/2021 6:47:58 PM
From: Jeffrey S. Mitchell
   of 61555
 
The short version, couched as a pickup line:

Can I see if I can make you laugh by giving you two test tickles?

- Jeff

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To: Jeffrey S. Mitchell who wrote (61025)10/25/2021 9:21:39 PM
From: Savant
1 Recommendation   of 61555
 
Or the coed warning the new coed about a certain professor...."don't worry about the quizees, it's the testees."

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From: Savant10/25/2021 9:22:15 PM
5 Recommendations   of 61555
 
Ol' Frank..


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To: Jams who wrote (61015)10/26/2021 5:14:28 AM
From: ekimaa
2 Recommendations   of 61555
 
Now that's strange. I figured it's twenty firth street as the person who painted the number has a lisp.

Mike

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To: TimF who wrote (60991)10/30/2021 8:01:15 AM
From: MeTwo
   of 61555
 
Excellent :D

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To: Savant who wrote (60993)10/30/2021 8:02:40 AM
From: MeTwo
   of 61555
 
Haha, very good!

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