|(Apologies if this is a repeat)|
A notorious criminal goes to the local Roman Catholic priest and says, "Father, I will give $1,000,000 to your church if you will say the eulogy for my brother, but you must make him out to be a saint."
The priest thinks for a long moment, and agrees.
At the service, the priest says, "Before us lies a man who was a murderer, kidnapper and extortionist. He lived every waking moment plotting some new atrocity against society. It is to our great relief that he no longer lives among us."
"But, compared to his brother, this man was a saint!"