Dear Family and friends, Christmas Letter ‘09
“Why Do You Do It”
Not that a letter needs a title, but then why start using conventional wisdom now. At this time every year, as you know from years past, I try to get a letter written prior to Christmas to send with or perhaps without a Christmas card. I know I’m one of those types of people who have a tendency to question some things, and yet excuse other things without a thought. I don’t give much thought for example to the obvious disparity between those who own a business and those who actually do the work which brings a greater reward to the owner than the worker. Yet, on the other hand, I will often question the attitudes or ways of thinking of an individual who is either one or the other.
If one were to be surprised by the one thing which has driven my life for the past five years, it is because this is my first Christmas letter to you, or you, putting it kindly, have forgotten. And that ONE thing is………of course, the Lord, God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, all of the afore mentioned; HE, HIM, HIS.
So, knowing I was going to be writing this at some point, I asked the Lord what HE wanted me to relate through this year’s letter. And the Lord said, “Tell them about ME; tell them who I AM.” Just like years past. But I have to admit, I’m not entirely sure how to do that. I mean, I know who HE is because of the way HE has interacted with me, but I don’t know how to tell you who HE is mostly because I realize you have to take at face value what I will relate to you is true. And that doesn’t really bother me because I know some of you know who HE is by HIS witness of the Holy Spirit to you. It is those of you who don’t know HIM which gives me pause to wonder how I’m going to effectively relate HIM to you by HIS standard. All I know to do is tell you about some things which happened to me this year which I have no doubt was God. It may have been a Word of Knowledge, it may have been an encounter, or it may have been one or two incidents which came to pass.
At the end of January, Eureka suffered a major ice storm. I wonder why they call it an “ice storm”? It wasn’t like huge chunks of ice fell out of the sky. Maybe “hail storm” was already taken so it has to be called something. If I remember correctly, the storm started on a Monday night and ended on a Tuesday. Anyway, we got a bunch of rain which froze to everything. First, limbs started breaking due to the increased weight of the frozen moisture clinging to them, and then the power went out all over the area. I was so thankful I owned a chainsaw, we had candles, a fireplace, and a gas stove. There were a whole lot of people who didn’t have those things, not to mention heat. We were also blessed by being without power for only 36 hours. There were a whole lot of people who had no power for over a week and some for more than two weeks. Even worse, most people couldn’t go anywhere because of all the fallen tree limbs blocking the roads. We somehow managed to tuff out our time in the dark. I did what I could outside during the day clearing the driveway and a walking path around the house so I could walk “Sir Barksalot”, and SJ suddenly got the urge to do all sorts of baking. Between the two of us, we managed to keep the fire going in the fireplace. It was almost surreal. Every few minutes we would hear another limb breaking away from a tree and hitting the ground. Some would be in the distance, and some sounded like they were right outside our doorstep. The cracking of limbs or huge trees falling were the only sounds one would hear during the power outage when we were both inside the house. The snapping, cracking, and falling went on for two solid days and nights.
When it became clear what was in the process of happening once the power went out and the rain had yet to stop, I prayed. I prayed the blood of Jesus over our home and over our vehicles. Of all the limbs which fell from trees closest to the house, only one large limb grazed the front side of the house, putting a three inch gash in the siding. We had a property strewn with fallen limbs, yet only the one did anything which could be considered damaging. Both vehicles parked under trees never got a scratch. During the whole ordeal, I tried to remember the thank God for HIS protection. So many are the times I heard the Spirit of the Lord say to me in this past year, “I take care of MY own.”
On Wednesday afternoon while standing at the door and staring at all the limbs laying around the yard, I heard the Lord say to me, “What do you see?” I replied, “I see chaos, Lord.” Immediately the Lord countered, “I see opportunity.” I had no idea what HE meant. As it turned out, a whole lot of people went to work cleaning up the mess which brought life into town during a really slow time of year. It also caused people to reach out to one another for the common good. People in town pulled together and helped each other out. The Sunday morning service, the church still without power, was lit only with candles. It was one of the best services I had attended since going to that church.
Shortly after the clean-up was finished as far as I was concerned, the Lord began repeating the word “changes” to me during my prayer time. And, I continued to hear the words, “give it up”. Again, I had no idea what HE meant. In ’08, the Lord impressed upon me to give HIM a day. A day to lay aside all work to rest or spend quality time with HIM. So, around August or so, I began committing Wednesday to the Lord. I can honestly say since I started doing what HE instructed me to do, I haven’t honored the Lord like I expect HE deserves to be honored. But I do not do any type of work for which I expect to be paid or take pleasure in like working outside at home. There have been some Wednesdays which I had to work at the store, so I would set aside Thursday instead.
However, laying aside a day for the Lord did not cause my work load to diminish regarding the yard work on my days off. So, the Lord impressed upon me to ask a certain young man to help me. He gets a disability check, but has a lot of time on his hands. He has also shown an interest in the Lord. To make a long story short, it didn’t work out. I suspect the young man’s motives weren’t entirely genuine. I’m sure he has had a God encounter at some point in his life, but he has allowed the world to hook him into seeking the Lord for means other than what God expects of one when the first commandment is “To love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and soul.” The young man’s mouth said one thing while his actions and attitude expressed the opposite. While I never got a disability check, nor do I mean to judge those who do, I do know I’ve had a few encounters with God in my early years which invited me to turn from my own lusts of the flesh and give my life to HIM. Yet, every time I did, I eventually fell back into sin for one reason or another. This young man’s current state of life and my own from years ago hit too close to home. I honestly feel after trying to encourage him to help me with the yard work and subsequently getting so frustrated with his attitude that I’d only ask him to help me if I was desperate, I failed God. I also can’t help but wonder if the Lord was trying to teach me something more than trying to help the young man. I really hope I don’t have to walk around that mountain again any time soon.
It was shortly after I had prayed and gotten peace over not using the young man in the future that I started hearing the words “give it up”. I heard that phrase three or four times until I finally decided it was the Spirit of the Lord. But I wasn’t all that willing to just let go of it. I reminded God that I was giving HIM fifty percent of the gross before expenses. Surely, HE could see what a valuable asset I was to HIS Kingdom. Never mind that my seeking, and confessing, and witnessing and…., had suffered because of the work I was doing on the side. Yet still I heard, “give it up.” So in May after praying about it for sometime, I made the decision to stop doing the yard work. In June, I began letting those for whom I did such work know ‘09 was going to be my last year. When the Lord also said, “changes,” I finally began to understand what HE was referring to. As it turned out, of the twelve or thirteen yards I mowed or did other yard work for, only three or four customers were told of my intentions. All the rest went by the wayside for one reason or another. Of course, the Lord again instructed me on what I was to give HIM for ‘09 and how much; one hundred percent. You know, HE blessed me so much this year that I never missed the money I earned for any type of outside work for someone else. “Give, and it is given…..”
God’s Word says HE knows the end from the beginning of all things. Late last year, the spouse of a couple for whom I did mowing asked me if I would like a lawnmower the one wanted to get rid of. I have to admit I wondered why the person would want to give it to me. I had a perfectly good mower although it was showing the signs of a lot of use. But the other spouse didn’t want to part with it. So I told the one who offered it to me that I would talk to them another time, and if the one still wanted to part with it I would pick it up then. I didn’t want to except something where a conflict existed. As it turned out, I was given the mower. It was in really good shape. I asked a friend of mine to look it over and sharpen the blade. He confirmed the mower was in excellent condition.
One late spring afternoon, I went to the home of one of my customers to mow their yard. I unloaded my lawnmower behind my truck. I had the dog with me and was going to take him over to a neighbor just across the road so he could have another dog to play with. El Barko doesn’t get many opportunities to interact with other dogs. I got in the truck, put it in reverse, and ran over the lawnmower! OH……! I actually managed to pry enough here and there to get it to work, but that poor lawnmower was never the same after that. The Lord knew what was coming long before I ever had the need.
I’ve had several other things happen this year, but five pages is plenty, and I doubt ten pages would be enough to share them all. But one particular Wednesday, on my way back from a bi-monthly donation, the Spirit of the Lord came to me. I’ve had several of these types of encounters with the Holy Spirit. It isn’t the same as just hearing HIM. It is similar to what happened that wonderful May day in ’04, except instead of immeasurable joy, I’ll start weeping. It may be a song on the radio, something I happen to be watching, a prayer session, or simply thinking about the Lord when HE comes. I never know when the Holy Spirit will just show up. It is if the Lord moves upon me. I believe it is the “witness” of the Holy Spirit.
And I distinctly heard the Spirit of the Lord say to my spirit, “Why do you do it?” When this happens to a person, he or she can’t lie. And I said, “Because I don’t love them without discrimination as I know you do. I give it to them Lord, knowing they don’t judge the need, but simply desire to fill it in YOUR Name.” It made me more aware that as much as I desired to serve the Lord, I didn’t show HIS love to others as perfectly as HE does. I also realized how much I, as well as so many of my brothers and sisters in Christ are guilty of condemning unbelievers or believers who may not be where I/we are in our relationship with God through HIS Son Jesus. When the Lord first made me aware of HIS Presence HE not only made me aware of my own unworthiness for eternal life based upon what I did or didn’t do in my life, HE also made me aware of HIS love and acceptance of me in spite of my unworthiness. That is what the Gospel of Jesus Christ is, recognizing one’s own failure to live up to the law of God, and God’s love towards us so much that through the sacrifice of HIS Son on our behalf, we have the opportunity to accept Jesus’ sacrifice on our behalf. However, one must first admit to God they have sinned against HIM and those HE loves before they can accept HIS gift of forgiveness and grace through the blood of Jesus at the cross. Once that happens, we not only are forgiven, but accepted in the eyes of God not by our works, but the work of Jesus.
Yet, while knowing this basic doctrine of truth, I had forgotten that I was now responsible for not only coming into agreement with the leading of HIS Spirit, but treating others the way the Lord had treated me after I knew I was saved. Whether outwardly or inadvertently, I had failed to consistently show God’s love to others the same way HE had shown me HIS love regardless of how I was treated by others or by what thinking they chose to lead their lives in agreement or contrary to the Word of God. I not only started to notice how much I was guilty of condemnation, but so many types of condemnation coming from the “church”. It isn’t my job as a Christian to try to change the thinking of those with whom I disagree. I’m expected by the Lord to treat everyone, regardless of the details, like HE treated me, and when given the opportunity, to tell others about the Lord. Jesus is the answer, not me.
Why do I do it? Because Jesus did it for me, HE made me to know HIS love, and HE wants me to do for others what HE did for me short of making it all possible to begin with. And though I may never fulfill HIS Will perfectly, HE still expects me to try. The surety is: “I take care of MY own,” “I will never leave you nor forsake you,” “You will be with ME where I AM.”
After I let the last yard go, the Lord said, “A new season.” When I inquired of the Lord as to what I was going to do now, HE said, “Feed MY children.” I was standing in my basement about to go out the door, and the Lord said, “I want you to give ME an increase above your tithe.” I just leaned my head against the cinder block and wondered how I was going to be able to fulfill HIS instruction. Well, so far I’ve had no problem, although I admit I wonder what is yet to come. I’m sure the Lord will continue to surprise me as long as I continue to trust HIM. I wasn’t exactly sure what HE meant by “feed MY children.” So I prayed about it. HE showed me two prayer visions. In the first I saw a small child holding the Lord’s hand while walking away from me. In the second, I saw several small children standing around the Lord. I believe what HE told me is exactly what the Lord wants me to do.
So how was your year?
Thank you Holy Father for sending YOUR only begotten Son, Jesus.
Mike |
