…that she was outside a dry-cleaning store.
She knew that because there was a sign over the door that said,
Jeff & Brad's Dry Cleaning
Underneath that, in smaller letters, it said:
"We Are Cleaners and Dryers"
and
"No Shirt,
No Pants,
No Service"
Muffy rubbed her eyes.
"That's weird," she thought. "I never noticed that store there before. But I've been wearing these same clothes since February, I really should clean them."
So she took off all her clothes and walked across the street to the store. She swung open the door, and immediately received a brain-jarring blow to her skull from a large blue bar suspended at eye level.
"Owwwwwwwwwwww, what the fuh…?" said Muffy.
"Welcome," said a voice.
Muffy looked up, rubbing her forehead. Behind the counter was a young man, seemingly unconcerned by her mishap.
"What is that thing? And why is it there?"
"That's our new interface," said the young man. "We like it very much."
"I think that's one big ugly slab of blue you have there, kiddo. What's it for? And why is it in such a stupid place? Someone could get hurt. Like me, for instance!"
"That's our new interface," intoned the young man. "We like it very much. Would you like a cookie?"
"No cookies, thank you."
" That's our new interface. We like it very much. Would you like a cookie?"
Muffy looked around her.
"You know, this whole joint looks kind of dumpy to me. "
"Would you like a cookie?"
"Uh, I guess I'm not…ah, never mind. I have some clothes here to be cleaned. I want the blouse Martinized, the brassiere Clintonized and the shorts Wexlerized. Got that?"
"Would you like a cookie?"
"No, I want you to clean my clothes. You are a cleaners, aren't you?"
"Would you like a cookie?"
"No cookies, thank you."
"Would you like a cookie?"
"I want you to clean my clothes."
"OK, sure. But first you have to agree to our terms and conditions. Would you like a cookie?"
"Forget the cookies, please. What exactly are your terms and conditions?"
"Well, for one thing, you agree that by entering our store and speaking, writing or thinking in our store, you grant us, and our successors and assigns a non-exclusive, worldwide, royalty free, perpetual, non-revocable license under your copyrights or other intellectual property rights, if any, in such material to use, distribute, display, reproduce, and create derivative works from such material in any and all media, in any manner, whole or part, without any duty to account to you. Would you like a cookie?"
"Forget it, I'll go someplace else"
And so she did. |
